We all have our weak moments... the times when doubt and despair, hurt and jealousy rage and our days seem darkest. I struggle with my dark side, usually when I am alone and am still enough to allow doubt into my mind. Everything from work to my love life... I allow my insecurities to form a cloud in my head and over my heart.
But then something happens... take today's yoga class as an example. I woke up sore and exhausted and didn't feel like going to class. It took 30 minutes to convince myself to just go. It was difficult. I struggled... again & had to rest during a whole sequence again, but I made it through class. I try not to be self conscious during class, to just focus on myself & my practice, but its difficult when every other person is a tiny-size 4-20yo-super-flexible-thing. There was one woman in her late 40s (but still qualified as tiny-size 4-super-flexible) and after class, she came up to me and said, "you were amazing. you're such an inspiration. you kept me going in class today." It made me feel uncomfortable for a bit, but then I realized... that is one reason I am making my journey public, is it not? If I can touch one person and he/she makes a positive change in his/her life, no matter how tiny, every sore muscle is worth it.
I have to remember that I am one of the lights... the positive energy that flows through me can affect others.
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